If home is where the heart is then why is my blood still flowing? I live for irregular fribulation so send shocks through my spine and bring me back to life

I can see that you're standing right in front of me. Hands open, begging for answers. And i conceide, i'm looking for the same things too. I'm talking about me and you in my head. In my head, where happiness is a victory. In my head, where you can walk for miles in a matter of minutes while looking for a map to find your way. You have such a pretty face, but it's nothing compared to your way of justifying your guilded eyes. And your smile keeps me awake better than drugs. And your way with words is lightyears beyond your age. I'm handing out answers but they don't add up. I'm asking questions i've never thought of before. You are a winter wind running through my body, chilling my spine, stopping my heart but you kept me alive so i can pump my face full of blood when you walk by. You are the cat that caught my toungue and i hope you never let go

is there anyone fucking out there?

Get out of my head and out of my heart. You took over my body so easily. It hurts that you aren't here. It's unimaginable misery. I can't stand those memories we were going to make. I can't help but fantasize our potential perfection. I have the strongest desire to swear off love forever.